And in my 2018 round up I also wrote about so many of the positives that had happened pre-cancer. I think I was trying to find a small glimmer of hope.
I was looking for something positive to cling on to. The truth is I was drowning under the weight of the last 3 months of 2018. As a family we were clinging on for dear life only able to take one day at a time.
We’d only just started the second phase of Bilbo’s treatment, maintenance seemed so far away and out of reach.
2019: The Year of Two Halves
And so 2019 really came in two halves for us, of course cancer has been a huge part of it. But we’ve also done everything in our power to live our lives in spite of it.
We’ve taken every opportunity we can to make the most of every moment and make magical special memories.
2019 has been one of the toughest years of my life. I’m not sorry to see the back of it. But as it comes to a close I realise it has taught me a lot and left me with many happy memories too.
“Never regret a day in your life: good days give happiness, bad days give experience, worst days give lessons, and best days give memories.”
Bilbo returned to school and we worked hospital visits around school and ordinary life. And forever in debt to all the people who’ve donated blood as we needed a lot of it in the first half of 2019.
Between hospital visits we attended gymnastics at the weekends and the boys enjoyed a trip to see Zog at the theatre.
Cancer continued to be such a huge part of our lives, every trip or plan was at the mercy of cancer. Through April we completed interim maintenance which was a lot of back and forth to Oxford. But the chemo didn’t stop us from squeezing in some fun and LOTs of dinosaurs.
May was most eventful for many reasons We were fortunate enough to get a chemo break so we legged it down to Cornwall for a fabulous week, reconnecting as a family.
But it was also some of the toughest times for Bilbo. He went back on steroids and it nearly broke me. It was during May that I asked for help: Day 211: Asking For Help.
And on one special day we got to meet a certain member of the royal family and Harrison flooded our house.
We enjoyed the warmer weather (and the odd bit of rain) through June. However it continued to be a tough month for Bilbo and he lost his hair for the second time.
In July, Harrison turned 3, Bilbo finished school for the summer, our beautiful friends Andy and Andy visited from Australia. And we had an unexpected visit to hospital but we also finished phase four of the treatment.
August felt like a turning point for us. Maintenance started, Bilbo’s hair started to grow back, we drew up a countdown for all the exciting things we had to look forward to.
Harrison tried out horse riding and we enjoyed the heatwave.
September was a very important month, Nanny turned 60 and we all headed to Cornwall for some family time. Bilbo’s wiggle was removed and he started back at school.
We were finally able to travel abroad in October and headed to Ibiza. We also celebrated Bilbo’s birthday. It was so important to us to be able to celebrate his life when a year before we were faced with the devastating news he had cancer.
Bilbo celebrated in Ibiza and by going to Harry Potter World.
For the last two months of the year we’ve dared to feel normal, we’ve dared to start believing that we can have just a little bit of control back. We’ve enjoyed fresh air, family time and meeting Tom Hardy (as you do)
And with trepidation December arrived and the truth is I HAVE BLOODY LOVED EVERY SECOND! I am so incredibly grateful cancer has allowed us to have some normality. Our boys have been able to enjoy the magic.
And an especially HUGE thanks to Dawn for bringing the magic of the elf. I know i’ve not been a fan of that creepy little doll. But seeing the boys faces every morning has made it worth it!
To everyone who has been a part of our 2019 journey we appreciate you and want to express our sincere thanks. The love and support throughout the year has meant so much to us.
When the clock strikes midnight…we will have 807 days of treatment left. 2020 will bring us one step closer to finishing.
And 2020 is a big year for us…Harrison will be starting BIG school, Rich turns 40, Rich and I will be celebrating our 10 year anniversary and we have booked Disney World.
We will continue to support the cancer charities that are important to us.
And as a family we will continue supporting refugees.
So expect big things from the Godber’s in 2020 we’re ready for it!